My mood is pendulating, but dancing keeps me happy
So.... last time I said I was in a calmer period.... now it isn't anymore. Thousand of things has to be done and my e-mail queue is growing.... my "must-do" list that I happy have avoided since I came back from the states have now re-appeared and this make my stress-hormons reaching unwanted levels. I try to be smart though and Iv'e had a way better balance in life the last half a year, so by experience and not unnecessary worrying I do active decisions that I believe are gonna help me. Sometimes I feel I'm worthless and haven't really succeded anything (I know I have, but much wants more), today I was out of motivation and in really low mood feeling everything was heavy but my trainings helped me feeling better. I wonder if it's the dark, the big work-load or everything else making me feeling like this.
So, now I long-plan for the spring (school, exams, camps and competitions), for Christmas, (exams too, holidays...), my Denver trip..... but I also think a lot about life and where to go, what I want and how I value living in Luleå compared to Örnsköldsvik, versus Denver, and other possible towns. I think about relations and friends, hobbies and *sigh* school, that is like 3-4 classes where 2 are totally new, that is supposed to take 8 weeks but we only have 6.
Anyways, what most characterize my life on top the "must-do" things are dancing. This Saturday I and Lindvi are doing our first competition and we're both so excited about it! It's a lot of things around the arrangement but we both feel confidence about dancing to eachother and having fun when dancing so the worst thing that can happen is getting five 5's in the protocol. Yesterday we hade a "practice" competition and also that made me nervous but I think I need it to learn and for sure it's the journey TO the competition that is most enjoyable for me. All training together, laughing and things enclosing this hobby, training hard and making progress, that is an awesome feeling!
This Tuesday we had a rented guest-teacher at our bugg-practice. This guy work as dancer and the theme was inspiration. We did all kind of games and played around with every-day movements, like modifying "brushing your teeth"-movement to making shows to eachother and rolling on the floor, playing we were ninjas and god knows all. I've hardly had that fun in this kind of way since I was in care center, like 5ish. It was so extremely relaxing and inspriring, trying and testing my own bodys movement but also do things as other are doing them!
Today we have like -13 Celsius and we got some inches of snow so finally it feels like the winter has arrived. It makes me sad I can't find enough time going skiing and all that immediately but I'm also happy I've got the gift to have such an awesome dance partner practing with but also all other dance-people I meet that fills up my hobby with tons of fun! Thanks Hanna, Stil dans, LBS and everybody else around me!
One more thing.... I do my best to find a master thesis project to begin this summer/fall 2008 and I want to do it in Germany. My major is engineering physics and my profile is signal processing, so if anyone has contacts or ideas I would very much appreciate them.
So, now I long-plan for the spring (school, exams, camps and competitions), for Christmas, (exams too, holidays...), my Denver trip..... but I also think a lot about life and where to go, what I want and how I value living in Luleå compared to Örnsköldsvik, versus Denver, and other possible towns. I think about relations and friends, hobbies and *sigh* school, that is like 3-4 classes where 2 are totally new, that is supposed to take 8 weeks but we only have 6.
Anyways, what most characterize my life on top the "must-do" things are dancing. This Saturday I and Lindvi are doing our first competition and we're both so excited about it! It's a lot of things around the arrangement but we both feel confidence about dancing to eachother and having fun when dancing so the worst thing that can happen is getting five 5's in the protocol. Yesterday we hade a "practice" competition and also that made me nervous but I think I need it to learn and for sure it's the journey TO the competition that is most enjoyable for me. All training together, laughing and things enclosing this hobby, training hard and making progress, that is an awesome feeling!
This Tuesday we had a rented guest-teacher at our bugg-practice. This guy work as dancer and the theme was inspiration. We did all kind of games and played around with every-day movements, like modifying "brushing your teeth"-movement to making shows to eachother and rolling on the floor, playing we were ninjas and god knows all. I've hardly had that fun in this kind of way since I was in care center, like 5ish. It was so extremely relaxing and inspriring, trying and testing my own bodys movement but also do things as other are doing them!
Today we have like -13 Celsius and we got some inches of snow so finally it feels like the winter has arrived. It makes me sad I can't find enough time going skiing and all that immediately but I'm also happy I've got the gift to have such an awesome dance partner practing with but also all other dance-people I meet that fills up my hobby with tons of fun! Thanks Hanna, Stil dans, LBS and everybody else around me!
One more thing.... I do my best to find a master thesis project to begin this summer/fall 2008 and I want to do it in Germany. My major is engineering physics and my profile is signal processing, so if anyone has contacts or ideas I would very much appreciate them.
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Postat av: Matt M
If you make it to Denver, give me a call and I'll buy you dinner.
Stay inspired.
-m
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